Ephesians 5 submission: is it one to another or just wives to husbands?
There are a lot of voices talking about what submission means and it usually comes from these two verses:
“…Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God.
Ephesians 5:21-22
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.”
What does it mean? Do these verses belong together, or are they totally different topics?
First, Ephesians 5 Submission Is Not…
Because of the plain language we can be sure it cannot mean that husbands submit to wives and wives don’t have to submit to husbands. So, no matter how it gets sliced, wives have to submit … at least sometimes.
There Are Two Reasonable Options
By reasonable options, I am talking about the plain language of the two sentences next to each other. You really cannot take things out of context though, but I’ll keep it short right now.
- It could mean that all believers submit to each other equally and then Paul describes only how wives submit but doesn’t describe how husbands should.
- Paul is making a thesis statement about submission and then he details out what that means.
Breaking Down Option 1
Do all believers have to submit to one another in some fashion?
First, “submit” must be defined.
Submit means:
To yield, resign or surrender to the power, will or authority of another; with the reciprocal pronoun.
Webster’s 1828 Dictionary
To surrender; yield one’s person to the power of another; to give up resistance.
To yield one’s opinion to the opinion or authority of another. On hearing the opinion of the court, the counsel submitted without further argument.
To be subject; to acquiesce in the authority of another.
It’s clear that you cannot submit to someone who does not have authority over you. And it’s clear that submission is not a mutual activity. One entity does it toward another.
Perhaps a small exception to this is when, as stronger believers, we submit to weaker believers’ convictions when they have less grace for certain things. But this doesn’t go in reverse in that the weaker has to submit to the stronger believer’s conviction on the matter. So, even that is not mutual.
So, it does not seem that it’s accurate to say that all believers submit equally to each other.
Second, there are two periods.
Verse 21 is the end of a 4-verse sentence (that starts with “and” by the way). Period.
Verse 22 is the beginning of a new sentence. Period.
If the two were meant to be more closely connected, Paul probably would have thrown in a “therefore” or “for” or “wherefore” which he uses over and over again in this epistle. Really, count them! Ephesians is really a rambler that is hard to break up into sections or chapters.
Third, what about husbands?
If husbands are supposed to submit to wives sometimes, there is quite a gaping hole in their instruction as to how to do that. It is not described anywhere in the Word of God. How can they do it without instruction (not to mention no record of it in human history)?
Last, reconciling submission and headship
If husbands are supposed to submit to their wives, how can that be accomplished at the same time as being the head as they are specifically called at least 4 times? And how do they do that while not letting women usurp their authority (1 Tim 2:12)?
It seems that Option 1 really has to be forced.
Breaking Down Option 2
Option 2 for Ephesians 5 submission is that Paul is making a thesis statement and then goes to describe three major categories of authority/submission relationships to display what he means.
The chapter breaks (or headings if your Bible has those) are not inspired by God, they were added. This portion could easily have been divided this way:
Move the chapter 6 break to between 6:9 and 6:10 where Paul finally says … “finally”.
A really interesting way to study the Bible is to make outlines. This is an easy section.
Thesis: Submit yourselves one to another (5:21)
Supporting Example 1: Wives to Husbands (5:22-33)
Example 2: Children to Parents/Fathers (6:1-4)
Example 3: Servants to Masters (6:5-9)
New Thesis: Be strong .. etc. (6:10) …
In the immediate context, Option 2 is much stronger. An even strong case is built when considering all the other places marriage, submission, and authority is mentioned.
Wrapping Up Ephesians 5 Submission
We can always praise God for His Word. Whether it feels comfortable to use not doesn’t matter. How clear it is doesn’t even matter. But we can be a little extra thankful that something so important is not muddled at all.
Submission is important to God’s heart because it displays the gospel. If there were just one reason for marriage to exist, it could be that it is another way to display the good news in our daily life.
When submission and marriage gets muddled by worldly thinking seeping in, there is danger for the gospel to be misconstrued. We don’t want to do that!
Have you been taught that husbands and wives submit to one another? Does that line up with what the Word says? Examine it for yourself and pray.
